Filed under: Blogroll, Enlightenment, Happiness, Life, Love, Poetry, Realness, Thoughts | Tags: Love, words, Happiness, blogs, jonathan d beale, period, only one
There’s only one thing I want out of life,
and that is YOU.
You and your outstanding physique.
You and your underrated psyche.
Just you…
Because,
even if you don’t think so,
you are amazing.
You’re not just a man…
You’re love.
You’re sweetness.
You’re passion.
You’re strength.
You’re compassion.
You’re boldness and chivalry.
You are even the color cerulean.
But most importantly,
you are my forever.
You are my smiles,
my tears,
my laughter,
my pain,
my joy,
my breathlessness,
my desire,
my passion,
my life…
You’re even that brightly lit moon that night to night accompanies that lonely star,
which is I.
I was alone and stripped from any kind of love for an eternity and seven months…
But then you appeared,
a superhero hidden under that natural brawny figure,
sweeping me off my feet into a better world.
And now you have me completely hypnotized with those loving cerulean eyes that make me melt any time I even dare to think about them touching my skin with their gaze.
Yet every time I do,
it’s all I desire.
“Strip me naked with your inhuman eyes and make love to me,” I shout within my heart, every time.
Like you once confessed,
I don’t know how I went this long without you.
I don’t even know why I claimed wonderful things about past lovers.
I didn’t know anything about anything until you arrived.
I used to have walls,
but you tore them apart.
And now there’s just you and me in the middle of all the dust and broken pieces,
embracing each other…
Loving each other.
I guess what I’m trying to say in shorter words is that I love you,
more than anything…
more than anyone.
And that I am more than honored to fulfill the role of your angel on earth for an eternity of forevers.
Jon,
What I’m trying to say is that
YOU’RE THE ONE.
Period.
Filed under: Blogroll, Enlightenment, Happiness, Ideas, Innocence, Life, Love, Moments, Poetry, Realness, Thoughts, realizations | Tags: Life, Love, words, Happiness, blogs, true love, jon, jonathan d beale, cerulean, love words
My words have never served for much.
They’re not artistic.
They don’t even sound as such.
They don’t save lives,
and they don’t pay for my independence.
Mainly they’re just a bunch of letters put together, periods, and commas put together for my entertainment.
… Until the day when I found the source of all art,
the source that filled me up with all these magnificent new feelings and experiences,
ones I’ve never been able to experience due to my limited-pass in life.
It greeted me with extremely simple yet astonishing words that opened new doors to wondrous worlds full of exciting adventures.
It smiled a smile that blinded my eyes,
filling me up with a light that radiated from its whole being,
and an emotion stronger than life itself.
The light didn’t hurt.
The light didn’t kill.
The light healed.
And it was better than the rich sight our eyes provided daily.
“Oh! With this light as my source of life, let me be blind forever!” I happily announced.
Yet that was when it gifted my sight back, showing me the vast, cerulean-colored sea.
Oh! What a sight!
Better than all the painted masterpieces sold.
Better than the poetic narratives that most preached about.
And seconds later,
without noticing,
I was swimming in the bluest, most staggering, sea.
And I was filled with such peace and bliss,
that my worries began to softly melt away,
not caring about the fact that I wasn’t gifted with the skill of swimming…
Not caring if I would drown and die in this ravishing ocean,
where my body would either float on or drown in for all eternity.
I didn’t care!
… For I was feeling a connection with it that was just too unbearably remarkable.
Something that I couldn’t explain,
for no words would be enough…
No words could do it justice.
And even if there were the one word that would describe it perfectly,
no one would comprehend the gravity of this fondness,
for this feeling has yet to be felt by the rest of human kind.
But then the water started to drain away.
And I was left in a place filled with nothingness,
with a presence that not only embraced my soul,
but that now embraced my figure.
What felt like its arms pulled me in gently,
and as they did,
I could make out a brawny figure.
And as I caught my breath,
I sucked in the most delightful smell emanating from its form.
I could feel its arms resting on the small of my back as I listened to the symphony of his breaths.
I then let my head rest on this being’s chest,
and as I did,
a man was revealed out of thin air,
hugging me tightly,
his face buried in my hair.
He was white as milk,
but with a light touch of caramel.
His eyes were cerulean.
His hair was dirty blonde.
His figure was muscular, powerful, and grand!
And so breathtaking.
He was perfect…
Like a Greek God.
Everything about him had an air of mystery and a sense of complexity.
But in her head,
all she could perceive was the fact that he was just an angel gifted from above.
Her newfound inspiration.
A true miracle.
Her miracle!
One she would keep forever even if keeping him forever meant writing about him to the world daily.
She would do it…
All for him…
For she not only just discovered the beauty and inspiration she’d never had.
She had discovered something bigger…
BETTER!
… Love.
Filed under: Blogroll, Enlightenment, Happiness, Ideas, Letters, Life, Love, Madness, Moments, Poetry, Realness, Relief, Secrets, Thoughts, advice, realizations, weirdness | Tags: blog, blogs, esmeralda, Letters, Love, notebooks, notes, notes from my notebook, poems, sadness, the start of things, words
So I have this notebook where I write a lot of crap, and I guess I’ve been writing a lot of crap throughout the year. Here are some of them:
1. Numbers begin to appear next to algebraic figures. It makes no sense to you…
2. Winter Rush>
And I got high again.
It was winter, and the cold breeze just made you want to give it one more try.
Flakes of all different shapes emerged from the puffy clouds.
It was beautiful yet ironic.
I was standing in the middle of it all,
giving it a name; “Glass Wonderland”.
This rush only comes every five months.
My instincts advised to make the best of it;
so I did.
Oh, the glories!
The ways it made me feel,
waking up my most inner emotions.
The rush that went through my nose going straight to my brain,
traveling all of my body through my blood.
I could feel it all.
Everything just felt so acute.
The way my blood rushed through my veins.
How the pumping could be listened through my ears.
Everything was out of this world.
But the best part is yet to come.
I got shipped to another world.
Every…
3. I wish I could paint a new world,
one that wouldn’t be against me,
where things weren’t black or grey,
and fairness reigns.
4. There are times when things don’t go our way, and we stall for time to be able to take back all the things said and done, especially those we regret. But most of the time we can’t take it all back. Most of the things we say and do are permanent.
5. It’s a new day, so new words have to be born, and written. And today I wish to write to you and preach of love, my favorite subject.
It’s love, and the way we look at things, and the way those things make us feel. And the fact that there’s someone there, whether not physically next to you all the time, but their mind is constantly…
6. New days are wonderful, because it means we can have new experiences, or we can produce new words and say them out loud, and mean them with our hearts on our hands. And these words and experiences may change us or enhance the way we think or feel.
So this is why I’m writing to you, because I want to provide new experiences, and at least change your day a bit, because maybe with my words I won’t be able to change your thoughts, or inspire you in some way.
Also, given the fact that soon it’ll be that day in February filled with love and corniness, I wish to write to you and fill you up with thoughts of love, my favorite subject. And to finally confess the things I haven’t been able to say or show.
I know it’s not obvious, but you should know that it was due to your eyes…
7. Let’s figure it out.
Let’s see how things are meant to be once we open our eyes to the today,
and once we line things together,
and once those things work out.
Because the truth is,
we rarely know what we want,
and when we do,
we let it all go to waste.
8. My Julian was always lost in thoughts.
His mind always wandered to unknown places.
It was feelings he most frequently sought,
feelings of love and care in most cases.
While in search of those great feelings, he wrote,
wrote of his broad perceptions,
leaving blissful and inspiring notes
to the loving ladies he so mentions.
Nevertheless, he was broken in two,
forever trying to fairly decide.
Julian knew he loved her justly too,
but his heart and soul belongs to Lecide.
In the end, Julian was too aware,
and chose the right path to the perfect lair.
9. There are times when life hits you hard, and when the aftermath arrives you start thinking about the other times when your soul would be on a string, and about to fall, but there would be nothing you could do, except for mourning, screaming, crying, and letting your feelings out. And as you think…
10. This time it was the sun who woke up the feeling.
The outstanding rays shone on the exact right spot and the heat arose the emotions.
It wasn’t planned.
I don’t believe anyone,
not even destiny,
had the idea that this would ever take place.
But it did.
The girl didn’t seek; at least not in that direction.
But she found.
11. Hello.
I don’t know want to write
and if I do, it’ll all be a lie.
Because I’m numb
and I don’t feel anything to
be writing about it.
Filed under: Blogroll, Happiness, Life, Love, Moments, Poetry, Realness, Relief, Thoughts, weirdness | Tags: blog, body, esmeralda, great, i should be lost without you, jon, jonathan d beale, journeys, Love, love poems, soul, the end, the end of her journey, words, words that we love
Most picture the end as something that must come,
something sad and anxious,
something that souls don’t wish to come into contact with.
But for her it was completely the opposite.
The end was what she sought for most of the time,
and it was finally here.
The end of her journey was called Jon.
He was a brawny guy with cerulean eyes, as artists would say.
He had a tough character that would only melt at the sight of her,
with the biggest heart a man could carry.
And he entered her life by coincidence,
just happened to pass by.
But the passerby turned out to be the end,
and the end brought a lot of love and compassion.
And all of a sudden she was overwhelmed with feelings of fear and joy.
She was scared he would leave,
but she was too happy for having found the one.
And now he stood before her,
smiling away,
gazing deep inside the pools in her eyes,
waiting.
And as she stood right in front of him,
and as the static electricity pleaded for her to touch his body,
she immediately blurted out these words:
I should be lost without you
And with this, his smile faded,
and his eyes grew wide and full of joy,
speaking the many wonders his lips wouldn’t let him.
And so her lips parted wide, smiling away the smile she never thought she could,
holding onto his face gently,
caressing his soul,
and letting their lips engage into a wondrous occurrence.
For the first time the end had proved to be a great thing.
And for the first time the end turned out to be just the beginning.
Filed under: Blogroll, Life, Love, Moments, Poetry, Realness, Thoughts, weirdness | Tags: blog, cerulean eyes, esmeralda, forever, hope, i love you, i miss you, jon, jonathan d beale, Love, love poems, my forever, today, true love, words
Today I saw myself without you.
Today I pictured a life lacking you.
No forever,
no love,
no cerulean eyes,
no brawny figure,
no tough character,
no amazing feeling,
no fair decisions.
And truth be told:
I didn’t like it.
I’m sorry. I am.
But it’s not possible anymore.
My heart and soul got used to you,
and thinking of you not being there in my near future,
trying to fathom that you won’t be a part of it all…
It just isn’t possible.
I’m not strong enough to let you go.
I’m not strong enough to even imagine your presence disappearing from beside me.
I don’t think you know the magnitude anymore;
don’t think you’re able to decode it.
you are my forever
That’s all I can say.
Now all I can do is hope…
Hope that through those beautiful, blue-sky eyes you’re able to grasp the fact that my love for you is too strong, and that I’ll never let go…
I’ll always be there, even after life itself ceases away.
I’ll be there for every high and low,
every good and bad,
every tear,
every smile,
every pain,
every sorrow,
every joy,
and every love.
I’ll always be there, if you allow it.
Because I want you to be my Jon.
Because I want to live the life and love I know we’re capable of.
Because it’s you, my Jon, it’s you.
I miss you.
Filed under: Happiness, Innocence, Life, Love, Poetry, Realness, Thoughts, weirdness | Tags: beale, blog, cerulean, cerulean eyes, esmeralda, forever, jon, jonathan d beale, Love, manhood, once upon a day, once upon a time, passion, true love, words
Once upon a day, you came along…
And your brawny body shrieked of manhood,
while your fond soul squealed of passion.
And your cerulean-colored eyes quietly told a story of a man lost between the paths of love and virtue, trying to find his other half miles and miles away from him.
But as the distance grew thin, your stereotypical yet ironic ways began to fade away.
And then there was just you.
And then you knocked on my lifeless door,
ever so lightly,
and I opened up the portal to my heart.
And you took the freedom to sit at the edge of my bed,
while I sat exactly three feet away on that wooden chair,
the one where I spent hours contemplating the thought of you,
and you sighed.
And I asked, “Are you here?”
Because I felt you so far away.
But you answered, “Forever.”
And then, with a smile in my eyes, I knew….
Because as you spoke the one word, you stood up from my bed.
And as you cautiously walked towards me,
I felt my heart battling with my insides,
just trying to exit my body…
Just trying to unite with yours.
And as our lips touched,
and your strong hands caressed the sides of my face,
I realized nothing had ever felt this wondrous,
because nothing had ever managed to fill me up with such euphoria as this breath-taking experience, literally.
But then we both realized this experience was getting to me,
as I was slowly fainting inside your arms.
Yet you held me up gently just in time,
whispering into my neck with a worrisome voice, “You promised forever.”
And as I felt your breath against my neck,
and your words reach my ears,
I whispered back with a faded, yet genuine, smile, “And forever it’ll be.”
And it was forever,
because the man your eyes preached about was you.
And the other half miles and miles away was me.
And now we are here.
And it is forever…
Filed under: Blogroll, Dreams, Enlightenment, Happiness, Love, Poetry, Purity, Thoughts, weirdness | Tags: blog, dream within a dream, Dreams, Enlightenment, esmeralda, j, Life, Love, poems, Poetry, Purity, souls
It was a dream within a dream,
that’s exactly how it was.
And in that dream, life found their souls temporarily inhabiting in the exact same place, at the exact same time, withing the exact same context.
And as they woke up, their very souls found themselves trapped inside that dream.
They wandered, both dressed in the purest white, walking each one by themselves, each one filled with a sense of lonesomeness, around this unknown land full of darkness and insecurity,
finding themselves back to back at the middle of the trajectory.
As they slowly turn around, to try to discover the other’s identity, their hearts start to race, and their pulses grow thick, and their insecurity expands to the edges of the universe.
But then, out of the nothingness that came from within the place they were merely standing on, their hands felt the sudden need to touch, feeling the warmth that exhaled from each other.
Then a sense of touch filled their bodies, but he reacted first, softly caressing her fingers.
And then it came to his soul, the knowledge of knowing her, and the fact that he’s grazed those fingers before.
So he took her whole hand into his, caressing it tenderly, trying to decipher her softness, her delicateness… her.
And as he tried, her heart ran faster, because now she too recognized that feel, and the fingers that led it.
Still, she let his hands wander around hers, because somewhere inside her being , something was telling her that maybe it could be him.
And it felt like it was.
It was the way his fingers communicated with hers, and the way they knew where to go, and where to meet hers.
And then it was the mere fact that he softly signaled the words, “I Love You” onto her hand, something only he knew how.
With this realization, her heart stopped.
It literally stopped.
Yet she didn’t fade away, for she wasn’t really around the surroundings of reality to be able to do such thing.
Then her hand started to grow cold, and he realized it was her.
So he turned around, with a grin on his face, still gripping her hand, as a sudden impact of brightness shocked that dream.
And the whole place, whichever or whatever it was, was filled with light.
Not the bright, eye-hurting light, but the bright and soft light that oozes ones heart and drowns ones sorrows.
“Such purity meets in such obscurity,” whispers the dream, having carefully watched everything from his surroundings.
Filed under: Blogroll, Confusion, Happiness, Life, Love, Poetry, realizations, weirdness | Tags: blog, Confusion, esmeralda, j, Life, Love, Moments, Poetry, realizations, weird moments, weirdness
I was too fragile the night you let me go.
It was dark, and raining, and there were no lights out, except for the glistening moon.
You held my hands in yours and said, “I think we should part.”
And next thing I knew you were letting go off my soaked up hands and walking in the opposite direction from where I stood.
You didn’t even kiss me.
You didn’t even manage to say, “Goodbye”.
You just left, like that.
And then my head started to think at full speed, going through the files of our relationship, trying to decode what went wrong.
Yet there was nothing that gave me a clue, for every second, minute, and hour we spent together was filled with glory from both parties.
Days passed, and everything seemed okay.
I could breathe, even if it was only for a few hours.
I could write again, even if the only thing I could write about was you.
And I could be myself again, even if being myself was just my own way of being close to you.
However, they would always creep behind me, and ask me personal questions about us.
And then they would try to “help me” by trying to decipher what happened, even if I didn’t really want to have knowledge of it.
And then there was this: they tried to tell me how to feel…
They tried to slither inside my thoughts and change how I feel about them…
How I feel about you.
So it shouldn’t feel odd that I’m asking you to save me.
It shouldn’t be awkward that I’m asking you to rescue me from them… from this world.
Even so, it does, because it’s you, and you left me out in the cold, with those stinging raindrops on my cheeks.
But truth is, I don’t care.
I’d ask you to save me a million times, even if those million times you say no.
Because truth is, you’re the only one I’d let help me… the only who can.
Filed under: Life, Love, Poetry, Realness, friends, realizations | Tags: esmeralda, friends, Life, Love, online love, poems, Poetry, steven, things that just happen, words
She came up to him slowly,
Taking his hands into hers,
Easing his troubles away.
Visions of harmony suddenly started to creep up into his mind,
Eating away at the hurtful memories he had encountered in the past.
Nothing stood in his mind, except for the silhouette of this mysterious girl that had helped him let go.
Filed under: Happiness, Love, Moments, Poetry, Purity, Realness, Thoughts, weirdness | Tags: blog, esmeralda, her, him, i love you, kisses, Life, Love, Moments, Poetry, reality of things, the moment, Thoughts, weirdness, what we really want, words
It’s that moment that defines the rest.
When he takes your sweaty palms into his,
and he pulls you in close,
right into his arms…
And then your eyes meet and get locked up,
and there’s no way you can look anywhere aside from his wonderful, deep eyes.
And as you’re linked together, you can both feel the beating of your hearts thumping at the same rhythm…
And you can feel his hand running up your spine, resting on the back of your neck.
And you can feel his breath on your cheek as he gets closer to your face.
And you can feel his body fitting into yours, leaving no spaces…
And then you feel his smooth lips touching yours,
as it sings a wonderful symphony.
And you think about how wonderful it is that your lips fit in so perfectly,
as you both engage in this musical scene,
preaching your deaf words to the air that surrounds you both.
And then your hearts pitch in,
singing together as soul mates generally do.
Because that’s what you both are…
SOUL MATES.
So the moment did define the rest;
and the rest turned out to be forever.
